Blanche Look Alike?

Dear, sweet, whorish Blanche. This is glamour shots gone bad  worse.She was considered the be the most attractive Golden Girl, with southern charm to boot. I, however, have been unable to look her in the eye since the episode where her daughter plans to give birth in a non-traditional manner and Dorothy remarks that Blanche's bedroom would be more appropriate than the birthing center since "at least Blanche's bedroom has stirrups". ew gross. so gross. I can't believe that they weren't allowed to call people "cock-knockers" on tv back then but they were allowed to say this. My ears. They bleed.

Anyways. Sometimes I look at my dog, Butters, and I can't believe the remarkable resemblance he has to our stoic first president,  George Washington. This then begins the habit of looking at others and seeing who THEY look like. Blanche quite unfortunately, closely resembles someone who I  LITERALLY had a  nightmare about. He needs no introduction.

I don't normally feel bad for whores. That sort of emotion leads you on a slippery slope. Trust me. But this resemblance makes me feel bad for the late Rue. Additionally, Blanche's arms look more mannish than Richard's do. And he is an "athlete"!

So, you are probably sitting on the edge of your seat waiting to hear about this nightmare. It is so horrible that I feel like I should stop typing and take a shower. Even after all these years. I must have been, I don't know 23, 24 maybe. Meth really messes with your long term memory, am I right or what!

So, in my dream, I am waiting in the old Kroger plaza parking lot in my hometown of South Bend, Indiana. Waiting at a bus stop to be exact. Which, first of all, doesn't make any sense because if I were at the Kroger plaza i would've just called my mama and asked her to give me a damn ride home. Right? Then this dream would end up with me riding in a minivan littered with teddy graham crumbs. 

Alas, so I am waiting for this bus when it finally arrives and I go take my seat right behind the driver. I look around the bus and I notice that OMG Richard Simmons was on the bus too. I am not what you might call a "fan" by any means, but for a short period in the early nineties, my dad bought a bunch of his tapes and would periodically trap us (my brothers and I) and trick us into watching "Sweatin to the Oldies" combining two of the most repulsive topics at the time to use pre-teens. Enthusiastically, my dad would point out the wonders of the VHS. "Check out this song! He has so much energy! So motivating! Your mother and I danced to this song at our junior high school dance!" I do wonder though, if the video was so motivating, why was my dad lounging around while he was giving this peppy narrative instead of wearing uncomfortably short shorts and a tank top and bouncing around like the obese on the big screen tv?

So, back to the dream. I think," hey, I should be nice and tell this guy that my dad is a big fan." So I look at him and our eyes lock (you might want to stop reading here). He moves up to sit next to me and doesn't say a word but rather bouncescoots closer to me until his leg is touching mine and he places his hand on my knee. I begin to scream and the bus driver slams on the brakes. I yell to all who can hear "throw that goddamn Richard Simmons off this bus! I hate you Richard Simmons!" The bus driver complies, but I remain panicky. I look out my window as the bus drives away and see Richard Simmons staring at me, menacingly. I wake up, my sheets sweaty. Gosh, what do you think THAT means?

What do you think? resemblance or no? 

Additionally, I will take any dream interpretation as long as it is free.